Words Do Hurt, Well They Hurt Me

I realize this weekend that ppl I don't give a shit about can't hurt me. I ponder there actions, but there actions don't hurt like they use too. The only people that can still get to me and hurt me are the ones I love. Some seem to be so skilled at this art. I am extremely sensitive which most of my friends and family know. The words they say to me have a way of turning my world upside down when they are hurtful. This weekend that happen to me. Someone I love said something to me that hurt me. Hurt me so much that the moment didn't and has not yet pass. Every time I see them or hear their voice I think of what they said and it makes me want to cry all over again. I know that everyone has their faults me included, but I've been trying so hard to be a better person. A more responsible person and get back on my feet. Maybe its me and I'm truly not doing shit,but that is so hard for me to except. I was so excited when I left work Friday b/c they offered me a permanent position. I bought Champange to celebrate. Within a few hours my mood was totally changed. I felt like I use to in school when kids picked on me. The ppl I love have a way of making me feel like a child and completely useless sometimes. All I wanted was someone to celebrate with and instead I got hurt. I'm also usually very outspoken, but with certain ppl I love I can't be. Some ppl are not very sensitive to others feelings. So, instead of saying what I think I just say what they want to hear. Its sad that an adult would be afraid to say what she needs to, but Its just not worth it most times. This time was the one time I tried to stand up for myself b/c I felt I was right and it only hurt in the end and the point I was making was totally not seen. I guess I can't win for losing. This whole incident has made me more determined though. I am determined to succeed and do better that what I'm doing. I'm not gonna look back and have regrets. I have to get out of my situation in order to keep my sanity and I'm crazy enough so a sista gotta get it together lol. I wish I could take a pill everyday that made me less sensitive. Its my greatest weakness. Moral of my story is "Words do hurt and Fuck Everyone all you have is yourself in the end." ~Smooches~